Recovering From Childhood Sexual Abuse

“Break your silence, heal your shame, thrive in life”

As an adult who has experienced sexual abuse during childhood, you may or may not fully realise that your current life struggles could be associated with your past abuse history. Sexual abuse is traumatic. Sexual trauma happened in relationship and it is in the right relationship that one has the opportunity to heal.

Healing is a relational and collaborative process. Healing comes in un-silencing and travelling at a pace that is comfortable for you, one step at a time. It involves figuring out together how what happened to you continues to impact you in the present, what you would like to experience differently, and how to begin steps to achieve that.

Initially, it is common to experience feelings of hopelessness and helplessness – “I’m not worthy”, “I haven’t got what it takes”, “It’s not the right time”, “things won’t get better”, or “what’s the point anyway?” You may feel there is no other way than to suffer in silence, shame, depression, anxiety, and loneliness.

Having had your trust broken as a child, you may have learned that it was safer to hide certain truths or parts of yourself, to shut them out as a survival mechanism. You may have buried emotions inside and puffed yourself up or tightened up, retracted, became smaller, or tried to disappear. You may have become loyal to dysfunction as a way of protecting yourself. Seeking the right support can heal the belief that isolation equates to safety.

You were not born with shame. Toxic shame (i.e. I am wrong) was handed to you and keeps you silent about what was done to you. It sabotages your power, intimacy, and creativity and prevents the free and spontaneous flow of your life energy. Unshaming lies in connection, in allowing shame thoughts and feelings to surface and sharing them with someone you build trust with as an adult.

By slowly developing your ability to connect with life experiences and gently learning how to inhabit the body and reconnect with its innate wisdom, you will find yourself feeling differently, thinking differently, and engaging differently.

When you can bring self-awareness, understanding, and compassion to what you find on the inside; when you find ground and a sense of safety within yourself and when you become more comfortable with yourself rather than losing yourself with another or seeking answers outside of yourself, then you know you are arriving home.

You are yet to live some of the most beautiful days of your life.

You are not alone.

Recovery is possible.

“For a seed to achieve its greatest expression, it must come completely undone. The shell cracks, its insides come out and everything changes. To someone who doesn’t understand growth, it would look like complete destruction.” – Cynthia Occelli

You may be experiencing:
  • Lack of joy and pleasure in life, sense of hopelessness &/or powerlessness
  • Extremes of emotion and difficulty controlling them – anger-rage, panic, numbness (shock), dissociation, collapse
  • Feeling damaged or not good enough – chronic shame, guilt, low self-esteem, feeling disconnected from self
  • Mistrust – issues with trust in self, in others, and even the world
  • Fear, anxiety, depression; feeling emotionally shut down; suicidal thoughts
  • Existential crisis – “What is the point of me being here? What do I contribute?”
  • Hyperarousal – feeling hypervigilant, irritable, and jumpy most of the time
  • Issues with sexuality – lack of interest, erectile dysfunction, premature ejaculation or hypersexualized; multiple partners, obsessive thoughts about sexual acts or partners you usually wouldn’t be interested in; confusion about sexual orientation
  • Self-isolation and loneliness – withdrawing from others and life itself
  • Difficulty forming close relationships – not feeling equipped to be in one or finding yourself in one dysfunctional relationship after another
  • Addictions and compulsive behaviours
  • Challenges with self-expression and creativity
  • Workaholism
  • Sleep disturbances – insomnia or wanting to sleep all the time
  • Flashbacks, nightmares, intrusive thoughts, or other signs of reliving a trauma
  • Emotional numbness or feeling constricted in the body
Benefits:
  • Reclaim your power, take charge of your life and redefine yourself as a person
  • Regain a sense of trust in yourself, feel more in control of your thoughts, feelings, and behaviours, and more confident in your decisions
  • Move beyond your experiences of betrayal and restore your beliefs about what is possible in relationship
  • Learn how to take control of your body, transform activated states and experience a full range of emotions in a safe way
  • Feel equipped to communicate more openly and engage in social situations more confidently
  • Address, explore and resolve blockages to healing (and intimacy)
  • Ability to appreciate your unique gifts and the resilience inside of you
  • Restore ability to feel confident in defending and protecting yourself (reawakening and reconnecting with our natural, innate impulses to defend under threat) and experience pleasure
  • Acquire the tools to live a full and happy life while acknowledging the impact that the past has had on you

To arrange a free 15-minute consultation, to book a session directly or to ask questions

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