Conscious Relating

“Love is the goal, life is the journey.” – Osho

Relating consciously involves becoming aware of how the imprints of your past experiences inform your current relationship patterns, learning tools to relate consciously from a place of safety and trust, and embracing challenges as doorways to inner growth and transformation. The process results in a deeper connection with yourself and others, creating more intimacy and greater aliveness in your life.

We may be drawn to enter a love relationship for many reasons including physical attraction, a commonality in interests, a desire for security and belonging, and a wish to be loved and love in return.

Initially, the connection may seem blissful and we may feel that we have met a life partner, “the one”, or that this time it will be different until something happens that touches our deeper wounds and has us questioning our trust in the relationship.

Before we know it, we may find ourselves engaging in patterns of acting out and blaming or shaming each other or shutting down, withdrawing, or even finding another partner.

The shift happens when we realise that on a deeper level we attract a specific someone who reflects or mirrors our level of awareness at that time as an opportunity to grow and help heal unresolved wounds from the past. Our partners and most intimate relationships may not look and act like our primary carers did but we will end up feeling the same feelings we had as a child when we were with them, including the sense of belonging and the love we did or did not receive, and also the experience and upset of not getting all of our needs met.

We become sensitive in the present to what was missing in the past. Left unaddressed, the echoes from the past simply follow us into our next relationship and we will continue to encounter disappointments.

Resistance to change can be strong and it takes courage and commitment to live consciously, to take responsibility for our lives, and to look deeper inside instead of blaming the other person. It can be challenging to break out of the ways we react and numb ourselves, resist change, compromise, and fail to risk fully opening our hearts.

A lasting love connection involves realising that conflict is growth trying to happen and that deep intimacy requires awareness, commitment, and inner work; two people choosing to do what is needed to create sufficient safety, trust, and openness with each other so that they can achieve a sense of deep connectedness whilst at the same time maintaining a healthy individuality.

Conscious relating sessions support you to disentangle from the legacy of past experiences that may be continuing to sabotage your life in the present, to embrace current relationships as opportunities for growth and provide you with new tools and techniques for learning the language of others as a pathway to growth, intimacy, deepening your love connections, and building healthy relationships.

“Love has to be of the quality that gives freedom, not new chains for you; a love that gives you wings and supports you to fly as high as possible.” – Osho